I miss writing stuff like this...


Panaghoy ng Makatang Ulilla
"Isinisigaw ko ang paglaya sa pagitan ng nakatahi kong mga labi”
Dani:

Nais kong balikan ang balintataw ng nakaraan.
Kung saan pag-ibig ang aking adhika
Bawat titik at katagang nilikha
Damdaming nais iparating, ligaya man o luha

Sa lalim ng gabi’y nananaghoy,
Nagsusumamo sa aking musa
“Bigyang buhay aking kataga,
Balutan ng pag-ibig ang aking salita.”

“Nahan ka aking musa?
Ibalik sa akin, regalong pag-ibig sa paglikha.
Ang pagtagni ng titik at tuwa,
Ang paglilok ng musika at luha.”

Sa gitna ng huwad na rangya,
Nananangis ang makatang nangungulila
Hangad pa ri’y tuwa ng paglikha,
Paghahabi ng damdami’t salita.

Note:
Sadyang hindi tapos ang tula sapagkat patuloy pa rin ang may akda sa paghahanap sa itinatanging musa.

     This was written early 2012 when I was musing about life in the confines of my room. I was then jobless, single and clueless on how to go on with my life. I think I even started crying for no reason at all... and that was when I wrote this. When i lost my inspiration to write, I think I also lest my zest for life and simply stood still - stuck. Thankfully I recovered and was able to bounce back. I owe this to the people in my life and to those who came into it while I was taking LEAP. 

Cheers!

The Evolution of my Internet Persona

I have used a lot of nicks or handles in my life as a netizen. I have been the Scorpionx, Bodythief, Memnoch1028, Raglan_James and Magnus in various chatrooms and websites. I have been JP, Paulo, Paul, Shadowsteel, lonehunter_ph, Boysuplado, Boytoy1028, Supladongbata and UrbanKnight. I have been really, REALLY creative in coming up with my aliases.  Truly when you're on the net, you can be anyone you want to be. 

Among all these nicknames and aliases, a few stuck to me most: Bodythief, Shadowsteel, Boysuplado and Urbanknight. I think I've used this four aliases on the net more often than the rest for the reason that I identify with them most. Allow me to introduce you to my four most favorite net persona(s):

I have a copy of this book's
edition among  many
 if not almost all of Anne Rice's
 Vampire Chronicles.

 Bodythief -  My all-time favorite net persona that I even made up a fantasy story of myself melding into the character. Probably worth a blog or a short story soon.  I think I have used this nickname on the net and in various sites more often than the rest. If you are not familiar with the Body Thief, he happens to be taken from the lead character in one of Anne Rice's novels. 

Raglan James learned how to steal another's body by switching souls with his victims. He had the misfortune of trying to steal the body of Lestat, Anne Rice's protagonist in the Vampire Chronicles. The book went on about how Lestat, with the help of his friends, outwitted and outplayed the Body Thief.

Anyway, my point here is that I chose the Bodythief because in my search for an identity, I sort of like, assimilated those of whom I interacted with at the time. I sort of "borrowed" identities in my hopes to define my own. The bodythief I guess, has been my alter ego for the longest time because I have searched long and hard to find my self. I can't say I have already found my entire life's purpose but suffice to say I have found the need to change overtime to adapt to changes in my life. I will be forever grateful to this alter ego for he opened doors to different aspects of the net (and my life) that I never knew existed. For years he and I trodded the same path. But the bodythief has served his purpose. He gave way for new alter egos to be born.

Boysuplado - need I say more?  People who know me personally or at least know of me would lay testimony to this charateristic. I am suplado (snob) incarnate. Even on the net, I'm very seldom to be the one to make the first move and more likely to throw somebody off even if all they did was say "hi". I find that this persona though attracts a lot of attention and admirers. Ideal for not so wholesome sites and anonymous social networking sites (all the pun intended!) Hhhmmm... I guess the Boysuplado persona stays,  but I gotta learn how to curb and tone him down. Sayang ang free drinks sa bars. hehe.

Shadowsteel - perhaps my most sentimental internet persona. He's the lonestar warrior, star-crossed lover and sentimental micro-blogger born out of Twitter. He's probably my most-opinionated persona, unafraid to lambast almost anybody whether or not that somebody is on Twitter. Oh, nevermind that he only has 81 followers. Nyahahaha!

Nevertheless, The Shadowsteel has been one of my softer alter-egos as well. I started blogging with him and has digitized my literary creations through him. I learned Multiply, Twitter, Blogspot, Wordpress and similar sites through him. As Shadowsteel, I began to see the internet as an avenue of growth and not just a  venue to socialize and stalk people. Ironically, as Shadowsteel, I am bolder, harder, more fearless, more visible yet quiet and stealthy as PeterPan's shadow. I am slowly showing off my face on the net as I am coming into terms with who I am and what I desire to be.

 

The Original Manhunt Central Avatar:
The Majestic Manhunt Centaur - the
true Urban Knight.

Urbanknight (Urbanite) - I have thought of this name way back when I was still co-managing a chatroom  via IRC and was elected area manager for its Ortigas and Makati districts. Given our city location, why couldn't chatters of our area be not called such? We were after all, the Central Business District dwellers, we were the authentic urban dwellers - the "urbanites".  Naturally our busy city lives eventually  took over and the Urban Knights drifted apart. I however, think this name still lives in me and is now more than ever descriptive of what I have become through the years. You see I am still here living in the heart of the Metro, still breathing,  still fighting to survive the urban jungle. My life experiences has broadened allowing me to be more mature, in views, attitude, action and perspective in life both on and off the net. It is still me, the sentimental Bodythief with the angst of Boy Suplado and the stealthiness yet daring of the Shadowsteel all fused into this urban fighter. I now walk through life bolder yet sensitive, stronger yet gentle and fiercer now more than ever. I am definitely more (mis)adventurous now and I will more than likely write more about them as I live the mark I know I leave into the lives of the people I touch.

Cheers!

So this was supposed to be posted weeks ago but since I have been procrastinating, I only got the chance to finish this now.
So I brought my sister's kids to Bonifacio High Street for some toy-shopping since two celebrated their birthdays recently. I cannot help but get sentimental when my niece came to me and hugged me and said "Thank you, Jaja."

I have no kids of my own (yet!). So naturally, with thirteen nephews and nieces (just from my siblings, not counting the cousins), all attention of the "doting uncle" go to them. Coming from a closely-knit family, I not only stood by while these kids were growing up but I was literally a player in their formative years. I gave them milk, sang them lullabies, put them to sleep and yes, even changed their diapers.

My point here is? Well, just spend time with the young ones while they need us. there will come a time when we will need them but they might be too busy to give us their attention. Whatever family values you instill on them while they are young, they will most likely do to you or their kids when they get older.
Oh and this article is inspired by the song "Cats in the Cradle". =P

Cheers!

I Die a Little...

This is a post from that other blog site and I decided to transfer this post here. It's a bit cheesy but hey, that's me. Read on if you like or mosey on if you're not interested, I could't really care less. (Insert hashtag #dedmatologylang here =P)

“Doctor, doctor, give me the news I have a bad case of lovin’ you….”

                                                                                -Robert Palmer

I die a little every day that I don’t get to see you.

And if I don’t hear from you, I lose a heartbeat.

I die when I miss you,

Yet I live with every moment that I yearn for you.

I die a little every time we fight,

Each moment of strife hurts like a knife.

But in spite of aches and pains and bumps along the way,

I live with your kisses and caresses and you lying by my side.

I die a little when your love blazes like raging fire,

Your love consumes me as much as I thrive on it.

I die a little when your love burns me….

Yet I could live forever when I’m with you

I die a little as I love and live,

Immortalized by your love for me and my love for you

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I have come to love you.

And that would never fade, never die.

Reborn!

I have been jumping blog sites every so often that I sometimes lose my blogs and have a difficult time tracking them.  I have activated, then erased, then reactivated then erased my Blogger profile. I have moved to another blog site then deleted it then reactivated it. Call me a Nomadic blogger or NPB (No Permanent Blog).

But why do I choose to reactivate this blog now? I honestly don't know. With the various blog sites out there, Blogger seem to be the easiest choice for me since I don't have to have multiple ids, just my Google account.
Plus, it already has some custom templates that would supposedly make my blogging easier.(I don't know about that! Would you have a template that would automatically translate my thoughts into words?)

Nevertheless, I resurrect my blog with the hopes that this time around, I get to write/post more often about my (mis)adventures in work, love(s) and  life itself in general and it's significance to the cosmos.

Cheers!